Sunday, January 22, 2012

Cutting out sales commissions means happy salespeople?! WTF?

Okay, so maybe those people in the land of Hippies over at Fog creek (wherever that is) think that sales people can all join hands and sing Kumbaya together and "focus on what's right instead of getting the sale", but you know what?  They say it's not fair to pay their people on commissions because it's manipulative to pay people for the work they do.  I'm all for a Theory Y workplace when the work your people do is creative and requires teamwork.

Customers reward and reprimand based upon the product and quality of products they receive.  If I shipped crappy barrels, we make crappy wine, nobody buys the crappy wine and eventually I'm out of a job.  It's pretty darn simple.  But, I get paid whether we get the barrels in or not.  Maybe I don't care so much about how important those new 220 barrels are to to the new flavors we're creating.   So, what gets me going?  Prunes.  Okay, after the prunes, what gets me going is knowing the customer is going to enjoy my products.

So, the sales guys have to convince people to take on that wine.  They have to go around and get it in the stores.  If they don't... it doesn't matter how good it is, sitting on a shelf, impressing the everliving bejesus out of me.  Sell my wines, you whimpering little snots!!  If you don't, I'm out of a job.  I love my job!

So, all this Theory X vs Theory Y mumbo jumbo is fine, when the people spend all damned day drinking and carousing on the company dime... it reminds them that they actually have to do some work.  So, quit whining about how hard it is, and start wining... and dining... some prospects and move our product!